Ruther writes:
Valentine’s Day is just around the corner and is one of the sweetest,most kilig days of the year for sweethearts and sweethearts-to-be. It is the day where love is widely recognized and celebrated, when girls and boys put much effort into thinking of “the perfect gifts” for their significant others—gifts that will show how much the other means to them, and thanking each other for the perfect not-so-perfect relationship they share.
That’s right—perfect not-so-perfect relationship.
We all know that no matter how lovers like to say and think that they are compatible, relationships do not always stay as smooth as glass. Misunderstandings come occasionally to break that smoothness, testing how far each will go to keep the relationship whole. It can come from really serious matters, or from petty ones. For example, girls prefer to be shown affection through intangible means—as such “its not the teddy bears,the chocolates or the flowers I want from him—its his time”, while guys (most of the time) tend to think that giving material things along with the intangibles result in a more powerful expression of affection—as such “ill bring her a teddy bear when I visit her so she will know how much I’ve missed her”.
Sometimes, we tend to expect that we be shown love the way we show love to others. But the thing is, everybody has a different way of showing love. Gary Chapman, author of “The Five Love Languages” illustrates how love can be communicated in different ways.
Words of Affirmation
One way to show love is though appreciation. Words such as “great job!” “you’re the best” and “we can do it” show how much you are appreciated and valued. Compliments work to encourage and boost your self-esteem, which in the end, make you think and feel good about yourself. Love does not only make you happy because someone loves you, but also because you love yourself.
Quality Time
Another way to show love is by spending time with the one you love. You feel loved if you receive focused attention and energy from the person you love. Love, like many other things grow with time and experience. So experiencing things together does not only make you know each other more, but also give you more reasons to keep on loving each other.
Receiving gifts
It is a tangible expression of love that assures you that he/ she does not only think of you, but he/she also wants to make you happy. Gifts are visual manifestations of love. A simple present to reward ones success will show how much he / she is appreciated—as such, flowers are the universal material representation of love (along with chocolates and bears).
Acts of service
You feel loved when someone helps you carry out your responsibility. Such love requires effort, energy, and time from another person. Helping one to carry out certain tasks is an indication that he / she is cared for and therefore, loved.
Physical touch
Of course, the expression of love cannot be complete without physical manifestations of it. Holding hands, embracing, kissing are some of the most common explicit expressions of love (aside from words). Physical expression puts sense in the saying “if you mean what you say, then do it”.
We all have our own love languages—we express love in different ways. It is important to know and understand our own love language and that of our loved ones to avoid occasional misunderstandings.
So what’s your love language? And what’s the love language of your loved ones?
Share us your love language…
*we support the I AM S.T.R.O.N.G. organization of ua&p
