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Social Support: The Hows and Whys of Cultivating a Circle of Friends
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S.
Why It Pays To Have A Group:
Studies on social support show that having one or two close and supportive friends is at least as valuable to emotional health as having a large group of friendly acquaintances or more shallow friendships. However, having social support from several supportive friends would be the best of both worlds. You probably already know if you're more comfortable with one good friend or many, but there are some good reasons to have at least a few different friends to fall back on:
- If you have only one person supporting you through difficult times, you may wear that person out, or feel unsupported if that person is unavailable. It’s better for everyone if you have at least a few people to depend on.
- You draw different benefits from different types of people. Having an outgoing friend to party with, a knowledgeable friend to gain information and insights from, and an empathic friend to be a good listener during tough times, for example, provides a better blend of social support than any one of these people alone could give.
- Your friends can bring out different qualities in one another that benefit all of you. For example, your outgoing friend could bring your shy empathic friend out of her shell, and the three of you could go out and party together. Plus, your friends can introduce you to more friends, giving you a greater pool of pre-screened potential friends.
- Studies show that a sense of belonging is extremely important for emotional health and well-being; those who have social support but don't feel a sense of belonging are much more likely to suffer from depression, for example.
How to Meet New People:
If you’re not still in school or working for a large company with a built-in social structure and constant opportunities to meet new people, it’s still easy to build new friendships. Here are a few ways to meet new people:
- Join a Gym. If you’re not comfortable striking up a conversation with the person on the next stairmaster, most gyms offer yoga, aerobics or even martial arts classes, which provide a more intimate setting and opportunities to meet people, perhaps finding a workout buddy.
- Get Involved in a Hobby. If you enjoy making things with your hands, perhaps you can enroll in a community art class. If you like writing, a writer’s workshop will provide a great opportunity to improve your writing skills and get to know other writers at the same time. Joining a class geared toward your interests ensures you’ll improve yourself, and you’ll meet people with whom you already have something in common!
- Volunteer! Getting involved with a charity you believe in will give you a sense of doing something positive to help the world, which has a great way of relieving stress in itself, and you’ll meet others with similarly big hearts and great passion for helping.
- Get a Pet Not only will you derive physical and emotional benefits from being a pet owner, you can meet others at dog parks or pet stores. There are even park days for passionate rabbit owners! Let your ‘best friend’ help you connect with other (human) friends.
- Have a Party If you invite all of your current friends and encourage each to bring a friend, you’ll have a pool of new people to meet. Plus, you may inspire your friends to throw their own parties, where you’ll meet even more new people.
- Smile! This one may sound simple, but if you give off an ‘approachable vibe’, you may find that you’re striking up conversations with new people wherever you go. Not all these conversations need to lead to a new friendship, but some might, and just one warm exchange with someone new can brighten up your day (and theirs)!
I enjoy being around friends, especially when I'm down. They offer a lot of support and find great ways in cheering you up. I have this friend named Avvy and she says the most hilarious things, I just can't get enough! I have many different kinds of friends who are all precious to me because of who they are. I just moved to Manila for college and I think I have met some of the most amazing people whom I'll never forget - block J during my freshman year, my classmates in IMC, students I meet in other classes, people I meet outside of school, and all my teachers.
Having friends makes you feel comfortable being who you are and they allow you to grow and mature. How have friends touched your lives?
Brought to you by UA&P I am S.T.R.O.N.G.
Brought to you by UA&P I am S.T.R.O.N.G.
777 comments:
1 – 200 of 777 Newer› Newest»Love it Jewelz :)
Something on Friendship! Nice!
It is important to be a true friend! don't ever fake friendship
As the saying goes.... the best things in life are free! friendship can never be bought and can last a lifetime! :)
frinds tayo ha
its good to have friends secialy the true ones cause there are some who are "user friendly" hahaha.. i hope you dnt have user friendly friends
My friends make me HAPPY :)
They make me feel good about myself!
i can be myself around my friends
Great!
Friends make you laugh.But sometimes they make you cry too when they betray you.So be very careful in choosing your friends.
You could consider one a true friend if he is there in times of sorrows too.Not just during fun times.
i agre with you anonymous, not only during fun times
i love your new post jewelz, kudos
It takes time to know who are your true friends.Because most of the times they would be nice in front of you,and sometimes they betray you too.
Masarap na kaibigan yan si Jewelz.Sweet and sincere...
Friends support us when we need them and when we don't, they are there when we need them the most and the least, and they offer us their friendship totally free.
Being in a group is such a blessing, so we must all treasure our friends. Without every blunder, every laughter, and every happy moment we spend with them, we won't be who we are today ^^
thanks for posting this in this blog, i loved reading it ^^
i consider jem cruz as one of my trusted friends in school. we have been classmate since the 1st year but, our closeness began last year because of IMC. he is really a good hearted man. there are times that i only look for him because i need a ride to go somewhere but he wouldnt think twice of going with me not because of he taht nice its just he has nothing to do this sem. hahah rock on jemerloo haha. seriusly, we (the boys and I) always have fun going out with him because he's kindness will always lead us to somewhere new or to a food place.. haha
i got the best friends in high school if i can only turn back ime ill go back to high schol
Masarap kasama ang mga kaibigan.Nakakawala ng stress sa school.
charles, that's such a great thing for you to say, you're really sweet
Kahit 3 deacades na kayo hindi nagkikita ng mga friends mo, bakit kaya hinahanap mo pa rin sila?
Another way to develop friendship is online. I founded www.bigwhitewall.com as a support network for people with everyday worries, deeper concerns and hidden secrets who can express what's on their minds openly, honestly and anonymously. You cannot always talk to those you are close to offline - as they may be the one you have issues with or for fear that they will misunderstand or judge you. Having an anonymous space to express what you feel (on bigwhitewall.com on a 'brick' using a state of the art Flash tool that allows you to upload and create words, images and drawings) and to talk to others in similar situations can be a vital addition to close offline relationships.
very nice topic jewelz, we should really know who our real friends are
Mga kaibigan, huwag naman parating pakabig. Kailangan ikaw naman ang magbigay.Para masaya ang lahat.At fair sa lahat.
walang kwentang kaibigan ung mga plastic
Meron ding kaibigan na nagpapahamak sa iyo.Kaya maging matalino at magmasid ng mabuti sa kanyang mga kilos.
True friends are a treasure!
A true friend accepts you for who you are
Choose your friends! Make sure they won't be bad influences
tama ka bitter, ang dami kong plastic na friends, as in plastic to the max
"Tell me who your friends are, and I'll tell you who you are"
isa lang ang nireregret ko.. hindi ko kasi naalagaan ang relationship nmin ng aking friieend.. nakakalungko kasi pareho kmi ng gusto at ugali click na click tlga kmi pati fave color pareho rin.. i miss you friend...
An experience: I had a friend I consider my best friend for 20 years.We had joy ,we had fun but when I became poor,and down,she disregarded me.It hurts on my part to realize after 20 years, that our friendship she based on money & material things.
Be keen and be wise in choosing a friend.
to bob:
alam mo minsan tau din ang mali kc nagpapagamit tau.. dapat mang gamit din tau
grabe naman yan, ibig sabihin mahal mo parin friend mo, namimiss mo siya eh
Jewelz,hanga kami sa iyo.Pantay ang tingin mo sa mga kaibigan.Mayaman o mahirap,maganda o pogi o hindi ka pogihan o hindi kagandahan,BASTA SINCERE AT HUMBLE,KAIBIGAN SA IYO.
We love you,
Your Friends
to bitter, o nga, pero nakakainis lang talaga yung mga taong ganun, mga wlang modo, akala mo close sayo kaya close ka rin, pero hindi, ginagamot ka lang para sa kanyang ikakabuti
As you grow older, you tend to just choose a few friends.Because you finally would realize that a few four friends is more than enough for you to take care of.
di mo pinahalagahan ang friendship na binigay sau sino may kasalanan nun? sayang pero i guess its for the better. i have a new best friend you have yours quits lng
"friends are hard to find"
do you believe this?
Friends come & go.Its very easy to meet friends.But as you grow wiser & older you would see that your very true friends are you Family.No matter what,they will love you unconditionally.
Great post!
Friends make life worth living!
Real friendship lasts forever!
this is a cute story jewelz!! it just shows how important yur friends are in your life.. yhank you for sharing this
To: Kuya,
Agree ako sa iyo.Your family is your most true friends! Two thumbs up!
:)
A very interesting Topic! Ang sarap naman mag comment dito.I think I might meet new friends.Kuya, ang ganda ng ideals mo sa buhay. Pahingi naman ng e-mail address mo.
my friends are fun
my mom is my bestfriend
this is the best topic dami pede ilagay eh
Kapag sobrang daming friends,nakakataranta! Wala ka nang oras sa sarili mo.Sa totoo lang nakakapagod rin.Hanap mo rin ang peace and quiet times di ba?
to anonymous above:
nyek wala ka nga nasulat eh
i have this friend, she likes to go out with boys, so she just gets all the boys that want to court her, she's not running out of boys, my gad that girl
My daughter is my BEST friend....
My sister is my best friend....
guys help me how do i know if my friends right now are true or not.. i mean if they are the type that would use me or keep me?
di ata totoo yan.. best friends turn out to best enemies. tsk. that's why i choose to be alone. i don't have friends. slashing is my hobby. wanna join?
guys help me how do i know if my friends right now are true or not.. i mean if they are the type that would use me or keep me?
Hello Daughterly!
You still awake? Please get some beauty rest.I will take care of the rest!You have been working so hard.
I love you,
Motherly
charles paminsan kasi may dedication ka pa kay jem. dramatic ito. ang gay pati.
emo kid i'm with you, let's play an emo song and slash our wrists
dfay pano yan wla ako mashare la ako friends eh la ako makasama sa school alam nyo ba madalas lng ako maglakad-lakad sa school or aroud the campus
even family sometimes cannot be trusted. its me against the world. another slash for that.
kaibigan ko mga tatoo
To: SOS
You would easily detect if a friend is true or not.Just be keen and open your eyes.Observe,observe,observe.
Spend wholesome outings with a group and you will see the true picture of that person.
"even family sometimes cannot be trusted. its me against the world. another slash for that."
STOP EMO! STOP EMONESS!!
sabi ng mga magulang ko wala daw ako silbi sa buhay, kaya gumawa nalang ako ng sariling kaibigan, nakapatong pa nga siya minsan sa likod ko, lagi ko siya kausap kahit saan man ako pumunta, si sub-zero siya, ang bait nga niya eh, loyal
guys guys.. walang slash slash.. the world is a wonderful place.. you will find happiness you'll see.. kung may problem sa family magusap.. masarap na kaibigan ang magulang lalo na ang nanay
walangsilbi, let's go and do that!
EMO PLEASE...
this is a wholesome website.Children read this. Many from Lourdes school.
You could be SPANKED for suggesting about slash.
100v why the hell?? do you control my life. live and let live selfish B*tch!
i totally agre lets stay away from the blades mga emo kayo wag ganyan
weh charles totoo ba yan?
lets be wholesome guys remee this is i am strng its supposed to promote values
yes emo kid, lang hiyang buhay to, nag laslas na nga ako eh, mapurol pala yung blade, walang silbi
Charles ,ang bait mo talaga. May God bless you more!
if you are strong, go and slash it! that is what you're promoting right? being strong!
oo nman!! instead of slash hug na lng!!! and by the way lets not use slash here again ha
sabi ni sub-zero maging masaya daw kayo, pag naglalakad nga ako sa parking kasama ko siya palagi, kahit saan ako pumunta kasama ko siya, di niya ako iniiwanan
nyek slashing is a sign of weakness.. its the easy way out and if you are strong live your life fight your battles..
spanked? you think i'll buy that concerned teacher. i always hurt myself and see real blodd. do you think your spank scares me? think again.
kabuki:
friends tayo forever!!!!
Lets all pray for the soul of EMO!
charles, pag nag hug tayo, pwede ikaw slash ko rin? para di ako nagiisa
Layas! Masamang espiritu!
charles. whoever you are, i'm fighting my battles. and that's my way to do it. get it?
I WILL SAY SLASH WHEN EVER I WANT TO!!
SLASH SLASH SLASH!!!
LET us all slash together!! and make this a better place to live in!!
if you are STRONG! you are not afraid to slash!!
to walang silbi:
kung ihug kita bkit idadamay mo pa ako? a hug means may sili na buhay mo dba
how come i dont have any friends? wmo kid can you be my friend?
Pa emo emo ka pa! MASAMA KANG ESPIRITU.LAYAS!
weh!!! well you're fighting it the wrong way!!!
emo kid, if you wanna end your life, we don't need the details on how you do it. ok?
guys pls move to ISHAREHAPPINESS
PROJECTISKO, IKEEPLOVEREAL, WORLDVISION, or KNOWLEGECHANNEL NOW!!
guys pls move to ISHAREHAPPINESS
PROJECTISKO, IKEEPLOVEREAL, WORLDVISION, or KNOWLEGECHANNEL NOW!!
SLASH is the life. you are right "friend"
alam mo emo kid dami mo problema eh.. if this is your way to find answers in your life then go ask them now we are all glad to help you with your battles in life.. were here to give advice.. ano game?
guys pls move to ISHAREHAPPINESS
PROJECTISKO, IKEEPLOVEREAL, WORLDVISION, or KNOWLEGECHANNEL NOW!!
hey friend:
its like saying your other blogs promote this thing well were glad your gone!!!
what did I miss?!
I back my fellow minions!! how is everybody? still fighting i see.. YOU GUYS!! OMG.. you make me so proud!
hahha... but this entry is all about cultivating friendships so.. let the cultivating BEGIN!!
sabi ni sub-zero pahalagahan niyo daw ang mga buhay niyo
advice? no thank you. i can deal it with myself. i want to be alone. and i don't need you. what made you think that you can help me? we are not even close. don't be too ambitious. dream on charles.
friend- sub-zero will visit you daw, he'll have a word with you
charles.. stop it ok.. you are being unethical.. and for me being ethical is the right thing to do.. ok.. did i make my sense clear? ok? alright.. fine then.. be gone and be done
To Charles:
Huwag nag bigyan pansin yang masasamang Espiritu.Mga sira ulo nila.Lets just continue with our good deeds.
Let's ALL PRAY...
deal with it B*tches! EMO is here to stay!
lets all be friends now and be happy lets share happiness in this blog. your world vision shoul be about goodness and values dont be out of place from now on.. the project of the scholars and everyone else is to be happy and good so lets be good!!! i love you all!!! this site makes me strong!! i love it here
emo kid! you should try visiting isharehappiness! stop being so emo! ok!?
YOU NEED HELP AND YOU KNOW IT!
emo kid is disturbed. go and end your life soon so we don't hear any word from you anymore.
ah friend...
tanong ko lng ha alm mo b ung ethical at hindi ethical?
kasi ako i try not to promote use of foul words here.. that i believe is ethical and if you want to throw freedom of speech, i will define freedom for you: freedom is not the ability or capability to do what you want to do it must be in accordance to the good and the perfection of the being... oh yan ha
to EMO KID:
if you want to be IAMSTRONG and ISHARHAPPINESS you must first accept that you are OP and then envision your WORLDVISION so that you will have KNOWLEDGECHANNEL. Only then will you be able to help others like the boy named PROJECTISKO, and keep your IKEEPLOVEREAL real!!
OK?! more power to your emoness!
slash your life away farwell. you don't make orders to people as if you control them. keep dreaming!
farwell you talk too much. you are one of the reasons why i hate the world.
emo kid:
disturbed ka pa rin? lmusta k nman dba pag minsan kasi kailangan mo rin maging mabait dba
CHARLES: ok! i think i need to study more ah.. because you know.. and you see.. I dont really understand certain concepts that you are throwing at me.. ok ha! magstudy muna ako ha kasi medyo OC ako and the pressure is getting at me.. pataas muna ako ng GWA ok?! cge see.. dont forget to brush your teeth guys.. kasi mahirap sumipsip pag walang teeth ok?! cge.. see you tom!?
BTW LUNCH NAMAN TAYO GUYS TOGETHER! wag niyo ko iavoid parang hindi tayo friendships eh
FRIENDS Are for keeps but sometimes you have to act as if you are friends with others even though you actually hate them to maintain your reputation.
MAY GOD BE WITH YOU!!!Thanks for all the comments.
guys pls!!! this is a comment box.. all we ask is what you thought about the entry.. i wish you could just voice out good opinions and some experiences that could help high school students
emo kid! i hate to break it to you but you have no friends here.. its so sad you need DIVINE INTERVENTION already!!
"guys pls!!! this is a comment box.. all we ask is what you thought about the entry.. i wish you could just voice out good opinions and some experiences that could help high school students"
CGE EH DI HINDI NA LANG KAMI MAG COCOMMENT! FINE!
who said i have friends? i resist to have friends. do you get it farwell? don't play dumb.
almost all the comments here are about how a friend touched your life nw lets talk about how yu tuch the life of youe friend. can you really say you're a real friend?
one night in our highschool dormitory one my friend asked me for advice because he felt that he could not continue his studies at the seminary. i am proud of this story because i was the one who gave him an advise and strength to continue his studies and mirale it could be 4 years na lng pari na sya hehe.. i told him to hold on and used God as an example of how he should fight because Jesus did everything so we can enjoy life and we can only enjoy life if we do the things we value most
stop using foul words here!!!
i like being a good friend
wow strong words iamstrong!
whatever iamstrong!! the only thing that's foul here is you!
di kaya anonymous ikaw ung foul!!!
jsut passing by... i love the story.. i have this best friend in college way before and i couldnt stop smilling while reading your entry it reminds me of the good memories we have
Hi Emo! Si Nemo ito. Huwag kang sumuko. Kasama mo na ako ngayon kakalabanin sila. Pero gusto ituloy natin ang laban. Ha ha ha.
Hoy kayong dalawa, Emo at Nemo. Ito naman si Memo! Three stooges na tayo ngayon. One for all, and all for one. Ho ho ho.
Charles, si Nemo ito, galingan mo ang pagsagot kay Emo, kasi talagang magaling siya dahil nasa likod niya ako parati. Kaya bilisan mo din ang pagsagot sa kanya.
Mahina ka pala Emo! Madali kang mapikon! Gising na! I like the way you do it. Bigyan mo pa kami ng maraming points.
Firends can be on your side and sometimes they can become your best enemy!
What are friends for? Friend must at all times be honest to each other, and help one another especially in time of crisis.
I like to make friend with honest people.
Friends are always nice to be with. Your parents can be one of them.
True friendship is full of trust and they enjoy hapiness together.
Sometime you have to earned the trust of someone to become friends.
Sometimes it is better to have a few good friends that are sincere.
Friends that hits you in the back are not really your friends, but rather you should watch out behind your back when they are around you.
Having an alzheimer disease is good sometime in the sense that "they always meet new friends everyday!" They dont remember if you are an enemy or not! Ha ha ha
I just like to meet new people everyday. By chance one of them might be a good one to be my true friend.
Cheer-up friends. Our numbers appears to be creeping-up. Someone is still awake early this morning! ha ha ha
I am everybodies friends, because they all look alike to me. They are good when I have something to give. ha ha ha
I love dogs! They are man best friend! They dont argue with you. ha ha ha
I am rich! I like buy friends anytime I want to. How much is your worth? Let me know.
Perhaps some people dont know the meaning of treu friendship at all.
In good times and in bad times, friends are there to help each other.
Your best friend is always a keeper. Take good care of each other.
Being close friends with Ppoliticians today might be detrimental to your well being! Watchout!
Its true that politicians are a big treat to your side, especially when you become a whistle blower.
Look what happened to former President Estrada. His closest friends are the ones who turned him in!
If someone is saying bad things behind your back, it is usually a politician.
Lawyers dont have any true friends. They like to defend all especially if you have money.
I like lawyers because they are like puppets to me when I tell them to do something, they bark like a dog. arf arf arf
Lawyers makes a lot of enemy especially if you loss the case they are doing for you.look at the Trillanes case.
I like dentist as my friend because they pull your teeth when you are sitting at the dentist chair.
Doctors are a good one to have as friends too. They tend to treat you better if they know you are a friend of them.
Doctors can also be a bad enemy if they are not your friend indeed! They can tell you that you have six weeks to live and you believed them by heart?
It is always nice to have lots of friends so that when the time comes to weed out the bad apples, you know who they are.
I hang out with my good friends, and when I am in the bad mood, I hang out with some that are not friends at all.
What is the meaning of true friendship?
good friends are hard to find nowadays. They are a diamond dozen.
I like politicians as my friends. I can changed them anytime I want like my clothes.
urbandub's video launch in 6UG pearl plaza, pearl drive on friday, 8.30 PM. see you there.
If you have lots of money, you can buy your friends.
Sales people are good to have as friends, you can save money when there is a bargain on sale.
Bus drivers are good friends as well because you can have a free ride sometime.
Barbers is a must to be your friend! You know why? They are carefull to not to cut your ears.
I like to make friend with many barbers. When one is mad at you, you can have another one to cut your hair better.
Cooks are best also to be one of your friend. They served you better foods when are in their restaurant.
If you want to eat good and healthy food, be friends with a cook, you can rest assure that it is not poison you are eating.
Knowing Policemen too can be a good one because you be friends with them and once you violated the traffic rules, you get a free ticket! ha ha ha
I hate cops that are crooks, but I like the ones I called friends, they let you go when you need it.
Its good to be friends with fruit vendors, you have a good selection of fresh fruits when need it.
you noticed that when you are good friends with a fish vendor in the market? They give you the fresh fish instead of the bad ones that are soak in water for days!
I hate polticians as my friends, you can never trust them at all.
look what happened to De Venecia, former Speaker of the House of Congress! His friends are the ones that shue him out of the speakership. What a shame!
If you want to practice corruption, try to make friends with politician.
It is painful to loss a good friend, but if they must go, you go forward and find a true friend.
Are you afraid to be alone? Well try to make friends with honesty, it will do you good.
i dont like cops to be my friend, they flip flap when they have to choose which side to be with in time of crisis.
Wow!Dami na ang comments! Thanks
I like friends that makes me happy always.
The opposit of friends is an enemy. True friends are always there for you.
n competition like this one, it is nice to have a friend in the computer world! Internet Cafe is a good place to hangout.
Students that are taking Computer courses are good to be friends also, they can help you fill-up the numbers you need to win.
I like many friends, they are good to have.
I fyou want to feel good and happy, be with your true friends.
Can you imagine not having a friend? Its lonely and boring.
I need seven more friends, they can fill in the rest to make it two hundred. ha ha ha
I need strong friends to lift my tired fingers, it is two in the morning! I am so sleepy.
Five more to go then I am finish my friend. Read it in the morning, it will make you happy.
So you need four to go to make it there? Well keep plugging my friend, you are getting closer.
I am heading to the finish line my friend, keep on working.
You are almost there my dear friend, please dont give-up.
At last home run, I reached the finish line. good night.
The umpire said, you are safe my friend, you are here.
CHARLES:
Thank you very much for staying STRONG! You were very Gutsy, being able to face adversity... Please continue in supporting our wholesome blog. You are a great example to all because you can stand up for yourself and stick to what is GOOD. Thank you again Charles!
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